Keep Your Head Up

Living in the middle of a room surrounded by other people is not the best situation for privacy. Anyone can see what you are doing at almost any time. Everyone learns your habits. In supplemental housing, roommates know if you are sleeping. They know if you’re awake. They know if you’ve been bad or good, so be good for goodness’ sake. That being said, it is pretty easy to get on someone else’s nerves or have someone else get on yours. Even in normal situations where you are around people, whether sitting next to a random guy on the bus, doing a project with your co-workers, or talking to your mom on the phone, it’s easy to get aggravated. That’s part of life. Sometimes you feel like the person is doing something rude, stupid, inconsiderate, etc., and other times you know it is innocent, but maybe you are having a bad day. Depending on the person and situation, you can get over it, fight it out, or harbor a secret hatred forever. But, for me, I am in the middle space between family that I can fight and make up with in an instant, and friends who will be offended if there is any type of conflict. This is where things get touchy. Coming across as too critical can ruin a friendship. Never telling the person what is wrong can make life nearly unbearable. Having a high-school-like gossip battle never ends well, and fighting it out like you would with family can get messy because not everyone will love or forgive you at the end of the day. I would be lying if I said life was totally perfect in a room like mine. It has definitely worked out for the better, but there are times when I have wanted to move out or leave for the weekend as a consequence of how I was feeling toward my roommates. I am not saying I dislike any of them, but there are times when I felt frustrated. What happens when these times arise? Luckily, nothing detrimental, but that is because of how situations have been handled: honestly and with patience. I cannot stress enough the importance of honesty and patience. To resolve anything you must make sure the issue is brought to others’ attention in a truthful way, and while discussing it and looking for solutions, it is key to take enough time to make progress. Sugarcoating or lying will let the problem rest just as rushing to a solution will most likely create an inadequate one. Even worse, rushing to a solution may give off the impression that the problem was insignificant, allowing it to continue guiltlessly. That can be okay if that is honestly what the situation calls for, but in a living situation where problems and habits can be ongoing, it is necessary to make a solution that is livable and convenient enough for both parties. Some days everything will be annoying, but it doesn’t have to be that way every day if you work to make it better!